Volume 1
Chapter 5: "Love" is Just So Complicated (Part 3)
●○●The Energetic College Girl Holds Back●○●
“Hello! I’ve heard a bit about you from Koumi~ Nice to meet you!”
…Huh?
That voice… it sounds kinda familiar…
I’d already heard about him from Koumi, but the guy standing in front of me was seriously good-looking.
He’s about 175 cm tall. Not super muscular, but not overly skinny either.
He’s wearing a loose white T-shirt, and a simple leather necklace hangs from his neck, adding a subtle but stylish accent.
His gentle smile radiates nothing but warmth, completely free of any ill will.
“…Mizuho?”
(…No, no, focus. This is the guy Koumi’s fallen for, and I’ve got my destined soulmate…)
I was thinking, No wonder Koumi’s smitten, when Koumi’s worried voice snapped me out of it.
What am I doing?! I need to greet him properly.
“Oh, whoops! My bad! So you’re Masato-san! Koumi’s told me all about you~!”
“Oh, uh, she has?”
Oh, she’s told me plenty.
Lately, Koumi’s gushing about him has practically become a ritual among our friends.
I figured her stories were probably colored by her crush, but maybe they weren’t as exaggerated as I thought.
As we talk, the guy in front of me keeps smiling. And Koumi, caught up in it, is smiling too.
It’s, like, dazzling.
(Wow, Koumi’s got it good. I wonder if I’ll ever get to feel like this when I find my destined person…)
I haven’t even met him yet.
But he was so kind—dreaming about something like this isn’t too much, right?
While Koumi’s off grabbing something she forgot in the classroom, it hits me—I haven’t asked him yet.
I’ve gotta tell him! You never know where a clue might pop up!
“Here’s the thing… Masato-kun, I need your help finding my destined soulmate!!”
“What?!”
Masato’s eyes go wide with surprise. Man, this guy’s expressions are so animated.
“So, I can’t get into the details, but… I have a destined person. And he’s probably… a first-year at this university!”
“Whoa, okay…”
“So, since you’re a guy, I was hoping you could help me track him down!”
I mean, guys probably have their own networks, right…?
“Uh, sure, but what’s his name?”
“No idea!”
“You don’t know?!”
Yup, that’s how it is.
I make a big “X” with my arms, and Masato dramatically leans back. His reaction’s so fun, I can’t help but grin.
“Uh, okay, then at least his department or, like, what he looks like…?”
“No clue about his department either! I think he’s a first-year here, but I’m not even 100% sure!”
“That’s an impossible mission!!”
I know it’s a ridiculous request, even as I’m saying it. But I can’t give up!
“But he’s got an all-back hairstyle, and his height… maybe about as tall as you, Masato-kun…?”
“Hmm… an all-back style is pretty rare.”
Exactly! If he rocks that all-back look every day, I feel like we could find him pretty quick!
I haven’t seen many guys with that style around campus!
“If you could use your guy network to help… please let me know if you find him!”
“I mean, I’d love to help, but…”
Masato’s face looks troubled.
Was it too pushy to ask him out of the blue like this…?
I glance at him, and he’s scratching his cheek, looking a bit awkward.
“Thing is… I don’t really have any friends.”
That catches me off guard.
“No way!”
He gives an embarrassed smile. Ugh, even that sheepish look is unfairly charming on a guy this good-looking!
“So, uh, I can keep an eye out for someone like that and let you know… would that work?”
“Super serious! Thank you! I’m so grateful for the help!”
Oh, right, Koumi mentioned Masato enrolled late, so he doesn’t have many friends… I feel kinda bad now.
As we’re talking, Koumi comes jogging back from the classroom.
“Sorry, thanks for waiting~! Let’s go!”
“Welcome back~”
“Koumi! I got Masato-kun to help me find my destined guy!”
“Oh, nice! Masato, does anyone come to mind?”
“Nah, no leads yet.”
The three of us head toward the station together. I’ve got a feeling university life’s about to get way more fun!
It’s about a ten-minute walk from campus to the nearest station.
Ten minutes flies by when you’re chatting with two other people.
“Well, my train’s this way~! See ya!”
“Cool, see you tomorrow!”
“Later~!”
By chance, Masato and I are on the same train, while Koumi’s heading in a different direction.
We walk Koumi to her platform, then Masato and I head to our gate.
Since it’s just the two of us now, might as well ask what I’ve been curious about~
“So, what’s the deal with you and Koumi~?”
“Huh? Oh, it’s not anything shady. We’re just friends.”
“Reeeally~?”
I nudge his side with my elbow, teasing.
If I can get even a little reaction, maybe it’ll give Koumi a shot…
“I dunno, Koumi’s just so kind, you know? She’s been this nice to me when I didn’t have any friends… Honestly, I’m super grateful. So, I guess I just don’t wanna betray her trust or anything.”
So serious. Masato’s way too serious.
Hmm, sounds like he hasn’t picked up on her feelings yet…
Hang in there, Koumi…
“Koumi’s been saying forever that you’re such a great person, Mizuho-chan. You two are really close, huh?”
“What! Koumi’s doing some solid work for once! Yup, that’s right! I’m a total catch!”
“Haha, you’re just gonna say that yourself?!”
Talking with Masato feels so easy, so fun.
Maybe that’s why.
I let my guard down. When I see two people walking toward us… my blood runs cold.
“…? Mizuho-chan?”
Instinctively, I duck behind Masato to hide… but it’s too late.
“…Hm?”
The two people in front of us… it’s Keito-senpai, the guy from my badminton club I confessed to, and Satsuki-senpai, a third-year who’s close with him.
Please don’t notice me… I pray, but as we pass, our eyes meet.
“Knew it. What was it, Tonozaki…? Mizuho, right?”
“…”
This is the worst.
Of all the times…
“Oh, the first-year who confessed to Keito?”
“Yup! Told you, Satsuki, messing with first-years leads to misunderstandings like this.”
“What? You’re blaming me?”
…Please, just let me leave.
I nudge Masato’s back, whispering, “Let’s go.”
“Wait a sec.”
But Keito doesn’t let me off that easily.
“What’s this? You confessed to me, and now you’re already moving on? Nice~ Real quick turnaround. Guess ugly girls have to flirt with guys to survive, huh?”
“Keito, that’s a bit…”
I’m not looking at him, but I can tell from his voice alone. He’s mocking me. Probably smirking while staring right at me.
I don’t want to see it.
“Come on, your new guy’s talking to you, so look up already.”
This is the worst.
The fact that Masato’s witnessing this. I thought we were starting to get along, but now he’s gonna think I’m pathetic…
I don’t want to remember that day I confessed.
The words he said come flooding back. No.
I don’t want to cry pathetically again—
“I’m an outsider here, and I don’t really know what went down.”
Before I realize it, Masato’s standing between me and them.
“But there’s one thing I do know, and I’d like you to take it back.”
“Who’re you?”
“Me? I’m Mizuho’s friend.”
“Figured as much. No way you’re her boyfriend. Dating someone that ugly?”
“That’s the thing.”
I can’t see his face.
But I don’t need to. His voice is sharp, brimming with anger.
“She’s not ugly. Mizuho-chan’s cute.”
“…Huh? That’s your issue?”
“I don’t know the details. I’ve only heard bits and pieces. But if there’s one thing you said that’s flat-out wrong, it’s that. She’s not ugly—inside or out. She’s a kind, wonderful girl.”
“Hah, what? You serious? A few days ago, this girl confessed to me. That puts me above her, obviously.”
“Above? What’s that supposed to mean? The person who gets confessed to is above the one who confesses?”
“Duh, obviously. The one who’s liked is always—”
“That’s the most delusional thing I’ve ever heard. It makes my skin crawl. You’re treating someone who had the courage to share their feelings like they’re beneath you. That attitude pisses me off.”
“…You…”
Keito steps closer to Masato.
…I have to stop this.
But.
Why is my heart pounding so loud?
Why is my face burning?
Behind Masato, I grab his shirt tightly.
“So, what, you’re saying you’d date her? I wouldn’t touch an ugly girl like that, but you would?”
“I don’t want to talk about her on the same level as someone like you, who only sees her as a tool to stroke your ego without caring about her feelings.”
“…God, you’re an idiot. Such a waste of a decent face… Whatever, I’m done. Satsuki, stop spacing out. Let’s go.”
The seniors walk away.
All that’s left is me and Masato.
“Ah! …Sorry, Mizuho-chan. I probably made things awkward with your club… That was reckless of me…”
That doesn’t matter. The club was already tough to go back to. I feel worse for dragging Masato into this.
But more than that.
“I thought maybe I shouldn’t butt in since I barely know you or what happened… but I couldn’t hold back. Sorry.”
Stop. Please stop.
You’re too kind.
I have my destined person. And the guy in front of me is the one Koumi’s fallen for.
“Uh, wanna grab something to drink? I’ve been curious about the new stuff at that café over there. My treat, as an apology?”
His awkward smile pierces my heart. I can’t stop my heart from racing.
God, I’m so jealous.
Koumi can openly say she loves this guy.
I take a deep breath.
It’s not enough to calm my racing heart, but it helps a little.
Come on, me, I whisper to myself.
“Thanks, Masato-kun! Ugh, how embarrassing~ You saw me at my worst! Yup, I confessed to that guy and got totally shot down! Like, brutally rejected. If I’d known he was like that, I never would’ve—”
Suddenly, he places a hand on my shoulder.
“You don’t have to force it.”
“Huh…?”
“You don’t have to pretend. It’s okay to say you’re hurting when you’re hurting. I… I’ve only known you for a few hours, but I can tell you’re trying to act cheerful. You don’t have to force yourself to do that when you’re in pain. No one could hear those things and not be hurt.”
“…”
“I’ll grab those new drinks from the café, okay? Just wait here for a bit. Take some time to process everything. I’ll listen to whatever you want to talk about. So… don’t push yourself.”
With that, Masato heads toward the café.
His figure disappears from view.
All I can do is crouch down and clutch my chest.
“It hurts…”
Tears spill over.
But the reason for these tears is different from back then.
Am I this easy…?
Why is it that his voice, his presence, keeps echoing in my chest?
I know the name of this feeling swelling inside me. But if I put it into words, it’s over.
—Because of my destined person.
Because he’s Koumi’s crush.
The guilt toward Koumi.
The feelings for Masato.
The moment with my destined person.
All my emotions mix together, turning into tears and they fall.
—Oh.
Love, liking someone—it’s just so complicated.
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